I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
