I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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