i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
