Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
