ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
