If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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