Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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