You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
