Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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