I swear god or herbie drove my car home
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize