can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize
