am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
