I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
