fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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