i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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