im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
