Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
