i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
