you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
