Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
This gyro tastes like lonliness
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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