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• (678): View more from Georgia

  I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.

  Fav 73 1068 13463

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.

  Fav 15 2010 4399

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.

  Fav 17 1653 3551

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  there's a liquor store near my therapist

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i might give it a shot.

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• (806): View more from Texas

  I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.

  Fav 4 2820 1076

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.

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• (415): View more from California

  A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."

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• (323): View more from California

  He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.

  Fav 2 294 215

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.

  Fav 3 192 139

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• (805): View more from California

  I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog

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• (239): View more from Florida

  I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.

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• (619): View more from California

  I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.

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