Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
operation have a gay friend backfired
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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