Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
