Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
