what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
smell my finger.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Randomize