I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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