how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
