Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Randomize
