between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize