Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
