You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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