So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
