Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
