Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
