On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
COCAINE IS GR8
Randomize
