Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
