At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
