He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
