My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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