i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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