How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
He felt like a one man threesome
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
