ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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