my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
She's the barista slut.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize
