i just wanna soil my oats bro
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
