We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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