Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Your mouth is God's brothel.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
