so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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