Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize