now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
where are you?
Hypothermia
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
