Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
