All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
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