I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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