"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
